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• 17. When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to their advice.
• 34. I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.
• 37. If my trusted lieutenant tells me my Legions of Terror are losing a battle, I will believe him. After all, he's my trusted lieutenant.
• 49. If I learn the whereabouts of the one artifact which can destroy me, I will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.
• 51. If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess' cell, I will immediately transfer him to a less
• people-oriented position.
• 53. If the beautiful princess that I capture says "I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!", I will say "Oh well" and kill her.
• 61. If my advisors ask "Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?", I will not proceed until I have a response that satisfies them.
• 64. I will see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a disadvantage.
• 84. I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex.
• 92. If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him. Instead I will say this his dogged perseverance has given me new insight on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few months of quiet contemplation I will likely return to the path of righteousness. (Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.)
• 100. Finally, to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless trance, I will provide each of them with free unlimited Internet access.

--The Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord

[Jenny]
Hey, Forrest...
were you scared in Vietnam?
[Forrest]
Yes.
Well, I..
I don't know.
Sometimes it would stop raining
long enough for
the stars to come out...
and then it was nice.
It was like just
before the sun goes to bed
down on the bayou.
there was always
a million sparkles on the water...
like that mountain lake.
It was so clear, Jenny,
it looked like
there were two skies
one on top of the other.
And then in the desert,
when the sun comes up...
I couldn't tell
where heaven stopped
and the earth began.
It's so beautiful.
[Jenny]
I wish I could've
been there with you.
[Forrest]
You were.
[Jenny]
I love you.

[Forrest]
You died on a Saturday morning.
And I had you placed
here under our tree.
And I had that house
of your father' s
bulldozed to the ground.
Mama...
always said
that dyin' was a part of life.
I sure wish it wasn't.

Little Forrest is...
doing just fine.
About to start school again so on,
and...
and I make his breakfast,
lunch, and dinner
every day .
I make sure he...
combs his hair
and brushes his teeth every day.
Teaching him how
to play Ping-Pong.
He's really good.
We fish a lot.
And every night,
we read a book.
He's so smart, Jenny.
You'd be so proud of him.
I am.
He, uh, wrote you
a...a letter.
And he says I can't read it.
I'm not supposed to,
so I'll just leave it
here for you.
Jenny...
I don't know
if Mama was right
or if it.. it's
Lieutenant Dan.
I don't know...
if we each have a...
destiny...
or if we're all just
floating around accidental-like
on a breeze...
but I..I think...
maybe it's both.
Maybe both get happening
at the same time.
But I miss you, Jenny.
If there's anything
you need...
I won't be far away.

--Forrest Gump

Juan Antonio: "My father is a poet."
Viki: "Perhaps I could read your father's work...?"
Juan Antonio: "But my father does not publish."
Viki: "Tell me why wouldn't your father publish his poems!?"
Juan Antonio: "He hates the world. That is his way of getting back at it."
...
Viki: "Well, what makes him so angry toward the human race?"
Juan Antonio: "Because after thousands of years of civilization they still haven't learned to love."

--Vicky Cristina Barcelona